Schools and Bully policy

Postby Diesel » Wed Oct 19, 2011 9:55 am

I thought I'd share this with any of you who are parents, or anyone who is interested. I know this section doesn't get much traffic at all, so I will understand if I see no replies. But I thought I'd share what's going on at my son's school.

My son is in 2nd grade. His school has preached their Zero Tolerance Policy for all 3 years my son has been there.

On the morning bus, going to school, a 9 year old girl told my son she will "stab him with a knife and run him over with a car". My son told my wife and I and we called the school. The principle looked into it, acknlowledged that the girl did indeed say this, and then told my wife and I that disciplinary actions will be taken. You know what was done? An electronic report was filed and her parents were told she said this. Nothing more.

My wife and I expected a week off from the bus or something along the lines of that. But when we found out the principle did nothing, we called and asked what the thinking was. The principle said he felt no further actions were necessary.

How is this teaching any sort of good to anyone? What consequense do kids have to worry about if they threaten to STAB someone? They will get an electronic write up and their parents will be told. Ridiculous.

My wife and I have filed an incident report with the police and we have been contacting many different people within the NYC school system about this. In a time where we are all supposed to teach that we are all accountable for our actions, and in an era where a "Zero Bully Tolerance" policy is being pumped each year, my son has been the victim of a "Bully" incident of which there was NO penalty for the Bully.

My wife and I are driving my son back and forth from school for now, because the girl was never taken off. We've askied for reconsideration of the penalty here and we've gotten the cold shoulder. God help this principle if my son ever gets physically injured due to his decision on NOT doing anything to a bully.

I thought I'd share my situation and frustration with some of you. If you are parents, I'm sure you understand my concerns.
Marc
*Ranked #1 Average Fantasy Football Player in the Nation 2004-2013

"Fantasy sports are all about LUCK. Except when I win."
User avatar
Diesel
 
Posts: 5981
Joined: Wed Apr 28, 2004 6:00 pm

Schools and Bully policy

Postby kjduke » Wed Oct 19, 2011 4:15 pm

Ever looked into this? ... K12.com ...

Not to diminish the lack of action by the school principal, but I wonder how many parents are aware of this option given the poor learning (and sometimes unsafe) environment of certain public school systems.

[ October 19, 2011, 11:38 PM: Message edited by: KJ Duke ]
User avatar
kjduke
 
Posts: 3204
Joined: Wed Jun 02, 2004 6:00 pm

Schools and Bully policy

Postby King of Queens » Wed Oct 19, 2011 4:39 pm

Sounds like the principal is not a man of principle.
King of Queens
 
Posts: 5235
Joined: Sat Aug 21, 2004 6:00 pm

Schools and Bully policy

Postby Diesel » Wed Oct 19, 2011 11:15 pm

I know many people swear by home schooling, but I feel that we need to keep our kids socially ready for when they are adults. Going to school has many lessons each day, in academics and in life in general. But safety of our children, in private or public schools, should be priority #1. My son's principal has taken something that should have been such a small, simple, disciplinary action, and turned it into a much larger issue by deciding to do nothing to this "bully".

This zero tolerance BS is just that. BS. It is up to the principal, what to do or not to do. This principal is playing bully roulette here so that his precious school's reputation isn't tarnished.

Well, mr. principal, the shool is tarnished. With your lack of leadership.

My wife and I have written to 7 on your side and many different people who you are supposed to contact if something like this happens. I will let you know if anything happens as a result of our constant cals and emails, or if the entire public school system pretends they didn't hear our call for action.
*Ranked #1 Average Fantasy Football Player in the Nation 2004-2013

"Fantasy sports are all about LUCK. Except when I win."
User avatar
Diesel
 
Posts: 5981
Joined: Wed Apr 28, 2004 6:00 pm

Schools and Bully policy

Postby thegambler » Sat Oct 22, 2011 5:54 am

the student that made the threat should have been suspended from the bus for at least a week.....with the "if you ever do something like this again your gone" attitude to follow.

there is nothing i hate worse then a bully....you have to nip that kind of stuff in the bud before they start acting on those words.
thegambler
 
Posts: 332
Joined: Mon Jun 06, 2011 6:00 pm

Schools and Bully policy

Postby Diesel » Tue Oct 25, 2011 12:08 am

Gambler, thank you for letting me know there are more people in this world with common sense, because honestly I'm starting to lose patience with people.

My wife has a meeting with someone today. She's not giving up until someone puts on paper that this principal made a poor decision in not doing anything to the "bully" in this case.
*Ranked #1 Average Fantasy Football Player in the Nation 2004-2013

"Fantasy sports are all about LUCK. Except when I win."
User avatar
Diesel
 
Posts: 5981
Joined: Wed Apr 28, 2004 6:00 pm

Schools and Bully policy

Postby thegambler » Tue Oct 25, 2011 5:42 am

Originally posted by Diesel:
Gambler, thank you for letting me know there are more people in this world with common sense, because honestly I'm starting to lose patience with people.

My wife has a meeting with someone today. She's not giving up until someone puts on paper that this principal made a poor decision in not doing anything to the "bully" in this case.
keep us updated on what happens....and good luck
thegambler
 
Posts: 332
Joined: Mon Jun 06, 2011 6:00 pm

Schools and Bully policy

Postby Diesel » Tue Oct 25, 2011 9:07 am

After the meeting today, my wife agreed to having my son and the girl sit in a meeting with a counselor at school and re-enact the incident and the counselor will show the kids how this whole thing could have been avoided. As much as I would love to see the principal reprimanded for his bad decision making, it's not going to happen. The NYC school system gives all power to each school's principal to do NOTHING or EVERYTHING he or she sees fit in cases like this. If the principal had taken this course of action at the beginning, my wife and I would have still rather had the girl suspended from the bus, but would have accepted the decision much easier. But this guy did nothing and now we've had someone over step him and created a solution to make sure our kids our safe. Something I thought was priority ONE...But I will now stop being nieve and open my eyes a bit more.
*Ranked #1 Average Fantasy Football Player in the Nation 2004-2013

"Fantasy sports are all about LUCK. Except when I win."
User avatar
Diesel
 
Posts: 5981
Joined: Wed Apr 28, 2004 6:00 pm

Schools and Bully policy

Postby DoubleG » Tue Oct 25, 2011 3:29 pm

Originally posted by Diesel:
After the meeting today, my wife agreed to having my son and the girl sit in a meeting with a counselor at school and re-enact the incident and the counselor will show the kids how this whole thing could have been avoided.
Diesel - Sorry I'm late to this topic. I agree with you that bullying has no place in the school system. Us as parents are 100% on our kids side and we would put them in non-penetrable bubbles if we could! :D

However, the real world is a cruel place where the stuff you described goes on MUCH more than you think or is ever reported. The general school policy is Lift. Rug. Sweep.

"Zero Tolerance" is simply a slogan they use to give a facade of political correctness. Makes me sick.

However, what you wrote and I quoted above, is complete bullshit. Think about it...the school's response is to RE-ENACT the situation where the bully threatened to STAB your son. Your son is probably scared enough with going through it once, let alone again. Would they propose re-enacting a RAPE?!?!? They don't need to show your son how it could have been handled better. It almost seems like they are saying it's partly his fault. UTTER BULLSHIT!!!!

Depending how far you want to take it...TELL THE PRINCIPAL you have a three step plan:

1. You are contacting the Superintendent to inform him of the situation as well as the lack of action IMO of the principal.

2. You are going to ask to be put on the agenda at the next school board meeting and air this out in front of everyone.

3. IF ANYTHING EVER HAPPENS TO YOUR SON DUE TO THIS BULLY, you will be discussing this with your attorney to see if (1) you can sue the district (2) hold the principal PERSONALLY responsible and sue his ass.

Remember, the squeaky wheel gets the oil.

[ October 25, 2011, 09:30 PM: Message edited by: DoubleG ]
DoubleG
 
Posts: 430
Joined: Tue May 17, 2011 6:00 pm

Schools and Bully policy

Postby Diesel » Tue Oct 25, 2011 10:34 pm

Mark, the way it was described to me was the counsellor will be re-enacting the incident up to the point of her statement, and as it gets to that point, the counsellor will be showing the GIRL what she should have done different. I should have been more clear on that. I understand what you were saying about how my son shouldn't have to go through this again but at 7, he didn't even worry about the words this girl said until he told us and saw OUR reaction. So I'm comfortable allowing the counsellor to do this with the kids and showing both of them where THE GIRL started going over the top.

*My wife has called or emailed every person above the principal about this already. She even wrote a lengthy email to "7 on your side" on abc news, with complete detail. Mark, I'm telling you from experience now that it is near impossible to do anything over a principal's head unless the result of an injury occurs due to his bad decision. You can not change a principal's decision unless you're ready to bring a lawyer along for the ride. What I wanted most is for this girl to be penalized for what she did wrong. We also asked why the kids weren't brought into a mediation session with a guidance counsellor, which should have been done. We now have a meeting with the kids which will resolve all that happened and the counsellor will be COUNSELLING them on this the way I feel it should have immediately. This wheel has been as squeaky as it could have and my wife spent hours each day for weeks now writing and calling people. Its been acknowledged that someone had to over step the principal in making this counselling session happen. That's the extent of the penalty for the principal. But I'm happy that its on record. Because if someone ever did happen to my son stemming from this incident, I wil need a lawyer of another kind because I'm going to see the principal myself and deal with it another way. But right now, we've had a step in the right direction and hope this meeting helps the kids. That's what I want the most. I want my son on the bus, safe.
*Ranked #1 Average Fantasy Football Player in the Nation 2004-2013

"Fantasy sports are all about LUCK. Except when I win."
User avatar
Diesel
 
Posts: 5981
Joined: Wed Apr 28, 2004 6:00 pm

Next

Return to Non-Football Chat Room

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest